Why there is Road Rage

So, I have to run a few errands this evening. First, I grab my bottles and head for the recycling center. There's a place not far from me that has a drive-through. You still have to get out and dump your stuff, but otherwise it's pretty convenient. There are two lanes: one for parking and dumping your stuff, the other for driving through. Sometimes, all the parking spots are taken, so I park at the curb and walk the 20 feet to the actual bins. What I didn't realize was that I was suppose to just park in the drive-through lane and block traffic for anyone who wants to leave. That's what the guy in the silver BMW Behemoth or whatever they're called did. He waved to me as I'm waiting to get out. What am I supposed to do? Wave back? Does the wave make it okay? Exactly what is he signaling, anyway? "Hi! Yes, I know I'm a jerk. Howyadoin?"

From the recycling place, it's a quick jaunt over to the grocery store. This one is always crowded for some reason, and the weekends are even worse. The rows in the parking lot are two-way, but the spaces are angled so that one side is outbound, one side is inbound. Unless, of course, you're driving an SUVwagon. Then you're allowed to whip around right in front of me, make a five-point turn, and take the space on my side of the aisle.

Once in the store, I make the mistake of not getting a basket. This is a mistake for a couple of reasons. One, it's a clear signal to everyone that I'm trying to get in, get out as quickly as possible. That's like sending up a flare. Second, it doesn't allow me to block the progress of others or smash their cart out of my way. For example, as I'm heading to the beer aisle, a man stops his cart directly in front of the aisle. Not inconveniently, we're talking completely blocking entrance. Then he just stands and looks around as if he forgot where he is. I barely manage to squeeze by and try to shake it off.

Next, I head to the dairy section for some milk. Here, some other mannerly couple has parked their cart directly in front of the one case I need to get into. And again, this isn't about it being merely in the way, oh no. It's parked so close that it's not even possible to open the door were I able to reach it. Needless to say, they're deciding on something in a completely different case.

After these hurdles have been passed, I head to the auto-check out lane. Silly me, I actually came at it from the front. A woman cuts across from behind and to the side, and cuts directly in front of me! It was unbelievable. Fortunately, she wasn't paying attention and didn't realize that the other check out counter was open as well. Haha! I easily side-stepped her blocking move and made it to the one closer to the door. Victory is mine!

I make it to the car, and take a deep breath before heading out. "Just stay off the freeway," I think to myself. Nah, I give up. The other errands can wait. That's just too many jerks in too short a time; I can't risk it. I made it safely home.